For the Carnivorous Foodie in all of us….by Jessica Chang


Olympic Provisions
(503) 954-3663
High end meat seller
Sort of like Tappas place.  You know how we feel about Tappas.  Booo…expensive, little food.
We tasted one of their cured meats at a potluck, Thanks Madoc!  It was great!  I had never heard of this place and so we of course had to try it!
What we ordered: We tried to order a taste of a lot of different stuff.  Because let’s face it, for tappas, it’s unlikely we’ll make it back here in the near future.  Maybe distant future though.  I’ve labeled the pictures, but honestly I can’t remember what the dishes were called.  The menu changes, so you may not see these dishes ever again.  However, as long as you can get a gist of the quality of the dishes, I think you’ll get my point.
How we ordered it: As is.  The stuffed pepper had some cheese in it, and the breaded pancake thing….well that was just a moment of weakness, there was meat in there somewhere, I swear!
What we got:
fish

pork shank

stuffed peppers, yes w/ cheese
lamb leg
pancake thing
Cost: Their menu is ever changing, and I forgot to write the price down.  But let’s just say that each small tappas was between 11 and 14 dollars.  Thasalotta dolla dollas for da meat!
Quantity: Considering the Meat-o-Meter’s past hatred of tappas restaurants, I think you know where this is going.
Quality: Olympic Provisions is a MEAT specialty store.  So you can expect the best.  Luckily the meat met our expectations.
MEAT-O-METER says!
So even though this place is super expensive, it’s nice to go once in a blue moon.  (Hence the not so smiley face, but with a thumbs up!)  Being Oregon’s first USDA ceritified meat-curing facility, they have all the highest quality meats and local too!  They were very tasty, flavorful, and well cooked. Everything tasted great, even my cocktail :)
When you go to a hoity toiyt restaurant such as this, don’t try to scrounge through the experience, you just have to go for it, commit, and drop some dolla dollas.  Just enjoy it and try not to be frugal with what is there on the menu.  If you’re going to eat at this place, try to embrace it; get a cocktail, window shop at their cured meat, order a couple tappas and heck even dress up a little.  It may just be worth your while.  We ended up buying a quarter pound of a pistachio-meat-loaf-type-thing!  It was mmmm delicious!!!!


Dick’s Kitchen Diner (DK’s)
September 30, 2010, 8:34 pm
Filed under: American, Southeast Portland | Tags: , ,

3312 SE Belmont St. Portland, OR 97214

503 235 0146

After we ate at this restaurant we HAD to write about it immediately.  Yes, I am slacking here on my posts, but hopefully this will jump start them back up again.  (Thank you everyone for reading and following along!!!!!!!!  Please spread the word!!)

Some people had recommended this place to us and the first thing they said was, “It’s a Paleo Diner!” The Meat-O-Meter and I looked at each other like, “Whaaaaa???? No way.”  We did our research and looked it up on the good ol’ interweb.  We were incredibly interested, but incredibly skeptical.  We have had several conversations with each other about what a REAL Paleo restaurant would be like and what a REAL Paleo restaurant would serve to be successful.  We thought no one would ever do it because it’s so against the norm and that it wouldn’t last…maybe as a food cart….maybe….

Anyway, when we heard about DK’s, we thought, “An actual restaurant that publicly declares themselves to be a follower of the Paleo Diet and actually writes in bold letters, PORTLAND’s FIRST STONE AGE DINER on their website.   It sounds too good to be true.”

Hmmmm....

So we checked out their menu online.  The first thing you see on the menu is burgers, sausages and sandwiches.  (My one eyebrow is raised)  Then we see words: vegan and vegetarian options.  We were like, “Whaaaat???”  Then the last page of the menu is a page long description of the Paleo Diet!  They even go so far as give recommended books to read up on about the Paleo Diet!!! (By the way Robb Wolf’s book, “The Paleo Solution” is the book to read.  Go buy it now.) Wait a second…..Paleo Diet: meat, veggies, fruit, nuts and seeds, Vegetarian Diet:  NO meat.   How is that right?  Not good feelings…..But, with all the hoopla and questioning from other Paleo followers, we had to go and check it out.  On a rainy night, we drove to the diner, located next to the Laughing Planet on Belmont.  (We come to find the owner of DK’s is also the owner of Laughing Planet)  This is what we found on every table:

Click the pic to enlarge.

What we ordered: Sausage Plate (recommended by the waiter to have the most meat for our money), Veggie Plate (your choice of 3 sides)

How we ordered it:  As is.  Supposedly it’s Paleo, so bring it!

What we got:

Sausage Plate

Veggie Plate - dinner roll not pictured

Cost: Sausage Plate – $10, Veggie Plate – $8.50

Quantity of the meat: Did you see the size of that cole slaw?  In case you missed it, it’s in that small dish that is the same size as the mustard.

The waiter recommended the Sausage Plate and said, “The sausages are huge.”  Then we asked him about the sides.  The waiter then said, “The greens are great.  They taste like they are cooked in bacon even though they are vegetarian.  The cabbage is awesome too. They taste really buttery, but it’s vegan.”

“Hmm” thought the bacon eating connoisseurs.  “OK let’s try it.”

Oh, the disappointment.  After the meal, we asked the waiter, “Have you had bacon before?”

Quality of the meat: The best thing from these two dishes was the sweet potato mash.  It was different and unique.  They do serve grass fed 5 ounce beef patties for their burgers.  That’s 5 ounces before cooking.  Can you imagine how small it is after it’s cooked? Yikes.

MEAT-O-METER says!

Ouch, the thumb’s not even visible.  That’s not good.

OK, there’s so much to say about this place, where do I begin.  First, if you are claiming yourself to be a Stone Age Diner, don’t say that NO-BUN is optional.   It should say that burgers come with lettuce, tomato, etc.. and bun is optional.  It seems like false advertising or actually total bs to go so far as to claim yourself to be a Paleo Restaurant, and then have bread everywhere.  What is up with that?  A Paleo Menu should look like:  MEAT OPTIONS, VEGGIE OPTIONS, done.

We do realize that it must be a big risk to go Paleo especially in Portland because we must be the capital of vegetarianism, but Podnah’s, Clay’s Smokehouse and Russell St. Barbecue seem to be doing just fine with their meaty menus.

I really think if you go down this road, just pull the trigger.  If anything, Portland is the place to do it.

So what is the difference between DK’s and any other diner?  I can get better sausages at another diner.  The server asked us how our meal was and the Meat-O-Meter laid it on him.  The server told us they are still trying to figure out the menu.  Figure out meat and vegetables!?!?!?!  OK, whatever.  We decided that DK’s is making the classic mistake of trying to appease everybody, but not satisfying anybody.  Have you ever straddled a fence?  It’s uncomfortable, and that’s what it felt like eating at DK’s.

From afar DK’s looks like the perfect grass fed medium rare steak, but up close, it’s just a regular peanut butter and jelly sandwich.



Quay Restaurant at the Red Lion Hotel
March 14, 2010, 8:28 pm
Filed under: American

100 Columbia Street
Vancouver, WA 98660

I’m not going to post their phone number or website because you don’t need it.  I struggled whether to post the address.

So we had a bit of a miscommunication with restaurant.com.  We didn’t read the fine print very well!  A lesson to everyone who uses these coupons!!! Meat-O-Meter is still grieving over his loss of $.  We thought the restaurant.com coupon was good for whenever, but apparently it is for DINNER ONLY.  We didn’t find this out until AFTER we ate everything we ordered.  Ouch!

What we ordered:  Fish and chips, Chop Chop Salad (shrimp, olives, mushroom, tomato) and a bowl of the Soup of the Day: Tomato base Halibut.

How we ordered it: Fish and chips without the chips.  Subbed in side of fruit instead.  Unfortunately the cole slaw had a cream type base to it.

What we got:

Halibut Soup

Chop Chop Salad

Yes, ALL of the shrimp are visible in this picture.  They all can be counted by using 4  out of  5 fingers on one hand.

Fish and Chips

Cost: Chop Chop Salad:  $15.95, Fish and Chips:  $15.95.  Soup:  eh….Man, this is almost embarrassing……

Quantity: Ugh!

Quality: “There is no amount of quality that could offset the ridiculousness of this meal” – MEAT-O-METER

MEAT-O-METER says!  (I think we know where this is headed.)


If this review will prevent just ONE person from going here for any meal, it will have subsided just some of the buyer’s remorse we feel whenever we think about this experience.  Yeah yeah yeah, the view of the river is wonderful, but I’d rather stand on the I-5 bridge during rush hour.



Burgerville
February 23, 2010, 12:46 am
Filed under: American, Fast Food | Tags: ,

MEATEATS UPDATE!!!

Burgerville now has a “Protein Platter”, though unbeknownst to some of the employees, they do make them and serve them!

Here is the MEAT-O-METER’s financial analysis and overall opinion of the matter:

We went to the Burgerville on NE Grand by the Lloyd Center and ordered the platter. The checkout person knew what were asking for but warned us it is so rarely ordered that they have to remind the cooks how to make it. Great.

$5.69 and you get the following. 2 x 1/4 lb beef patties and a weak side salad. There is also a chicken and turkey option.



We realized the receipt said bacon comes on the platter so we asked for it. We got it for free but was warned it actually might not come with the platter. So, I can’t guarantee it is included in the $5.69.


Ok, the receipt for the platter was revealing. Apparently, protein is not an important enough macronutrient to make the list. I was bummed.

(In case you can’t read it, the upper right hand corner has Calories, Fiber, Fat, Carbs for their categories)


We ordered a lone beef patty to compare.


After all that, here is what we know.

1) One beef patty is about 17-18 grams of protein – $1.75
2) Protein platter is 2 beef patties, 35 grams of protein -$5.69.
3) You can just order two beef patties for $3.50 and get the same amount of protein. By ordering the platter, you are paying $2.19 or 62% more for a weak, iceberg lettuce side salad. Assuming no bacon here.

Also, the Classic Burgerville burger that comes with 1 patty, bun, lettuce, tomato, cheese, and sauce is $3.39. You are paying $1.64 or 94% more for the bun, piece of lettuce, wedge of tomatoe, and slice of cheese. Oh, and if you get the combo meal with the fries and soft drink, it is way more.

4) I hear a lot from friends who have never tried Paleo say that it is expensive. Well, for the extra $1.64 or $2.19 you are spending on the Classic or the Platter, you could be doing a whole lot more for yourself. If we consider the fries and soft drink, get ready for a Paleo bonanza. The snack plate I made for myself below is 3 oz of Almond butter from Trader Joes ($0.94), 4 oz carrot ( $0.25), and 5 oz celery ($0.72) from New Seasons. $1.91 total, give or take.

Update: I couldn’t finish the whole snack plate. There was over 1/2 lb of veggies there and it turns out it is very filling.


In summary, I would stick with the $1.75 beef patties from Burgerville and just get me a bag of mixed veggies to munch on. For rating, see pic below.

******************************************************************************************************************************************

Ahhhh, Burgerville.  In my non-Paleo days, the seasonal milkshake would be a reward to myself.  Like ice cream it is an achilles of mine and I will always have fond memories of it.  I do miss it.  Well, they do serve meat, so maybe there’s a way to not totally elminate Burgerville from my life.  So we tried it, we ordered Paleo at Burgerville.  Not possible you say?  You might just be right.

What we ordered:  2 Tillamook Cheeseburgers.  Yeah, we could have done without the cheese, but we really wanted to give Burgerville a chance.

How we ordered it: No bun.

What we got:

img_0170

Using our Chinook book coupon for 1 free cheeseburger when a 2nd one of equal or greater value is purchased, the damage didn’t seem too bad.

Cost: $3.69 for 1 burger, with the coupon we got 2!

Quality: The meat patty actually tasted like beef!  They use 100% Anitibiotic and Hormone Free Beef from Country Natural Beef and their food sources are local!

Quantity: 1 burger at $3.69 is definitely not enough for a meal.

MEAT-O-METER?

img_0171

The meat actually tasted like beef!  Having local sources for food is a plus.  The amount of meat for the price was horrible.  They did serve the meat in containers that are compostable, which was nice on their part.  But overall, not really worth the visit for just one meat patty.  Burgerville may just have to remain a fond memory….



3 Degrees
January 13, 2010, 3:18 pm
Filed under: American, Breakfast, Southwest Portland | Tags: , ,

1510 Southwest Harbor Way, Portland, OR‎

(503) 295-6166‎

http://www.threedegreesrestaurant.com/portland

Happy birthday Kristi !  A long time reader and new Crossfitter!  We had Sunday birthday brunch at 3 Degrees recently.  So we decided to make a Meateats post out of it!  They have bottomless champagne on Sunday mornings!  Woohoo!  :P

What we ordered:  3 Degrees Omelet – sausage, onions, mushrooms, tomatoes, goat cheese.  Corned Beef and Sweet Potato Hash.

How we ordered it: No side of potatoes add in avocado, sub in side of fruit.

What we got:

Corned Beef and Sweet Potato Hash w/ poached eggs

Side of bacon and Side of sausage

3 Degrees Omelet

Side of fruit

Cost:  Corned Beef and Sweet Potato Hash – $11, 3 Degrees Omelete – $10, Side of Bacon or Sausage or Ham – $4

Quality: This is a nice restaurant and the quality was pretty good.  Everything was nicely presented and tasted just like good breakfast food.

Quantity: The quantity was OK too.  It was regular, normal, about right, not too little, but not a lot….

MEAT-O-METER says!

In case you’re confused.  The thumb is pointing towards him and the finger means he’s drunk!  hahaha!   The finger is for the bottomless champagne for $6.95.  Seriously, that was pretty good.  If you go with intention and bring a bucket, you can really capitalize on this offer.



In-N-Out
December 30, 2009, 1:21 pm
Filed under: American, Fast Food | Tags: ,

Unfortunately not in Oregon :(

http://www.in-n-out.com/menu.asp

If you’ve never been to In-N-Out, we highly suggest you visit one!  There are only 4 items on their menu. Double Double Burger, Cheeseburger, Hamburger and Fries (which are fresh and awesome too, if you want to cheat a bit).  Of course they have the regular libations at a fast food place, but also an assortment of milkshakes.  I hear they are tasty!  Not that I would know  :P

We were in Arizona for Christmas.  Everytime we go there or to California, we go to In-N-Out.  They have a Secret menu, with options to order your burger “Protein-Style” or “Animal-Style”.  “Protein-Style” burger means no bun.  “Animal-Style” means mustard and relish cooked on your patty.

For a list of all the items on the Secret Menu, check this link out!

http://www.badmouth.net/in-n-outs-secret-menu/

What we ordered:  2 Double Double burgers

How we ordered it: 2 “Protein-Style” Double Double burgers please! No cheese or special sauce. Add onions!

What we got:

Protein Style Double Double Burger

Cost: cheap, it is fast food afterall…Double Double Burger – $2.99 + tax = $3.25-ish….

Quality:  Their motto is – Quality you can taste.  It’s pretty darn accurate.  Their veggies are all cut on site.  For a quick easy meal while you’re traveling to the Southwest – In-N-Out is perfect!

Quantity: If you order “Protein Style” and you’re hungry, definitely get at least two of them!

MEAT-O-METER says!

Since we were in Arizona for only a few days, we had to make the most of our In ‘n Out experience.  Going on Christmas Eve (which was busy by the way) and on Sunday after Christmas, we ordered as many variations of the “Protein Style” burger as possible.  We ordered the “Protein Style” burger with “Animal Style” additions.  (mustard and relish on the patty).  Also you can add pickles and fried onions.  Mmmmmmm….so good.

We would love to open up an In-N-Out joint, but it is still a privately owned family business.  Their employees get benefits!  That’s pretty sweet.

In-N-Out is a multiple stop restaurant for your Paleo needs fer sure!!!!!



Gravy
October 24, 2009, 3:07 pm
Filed under: American, Breakfast, North Portland | Tags: , ,

3957 N Mississippi Ave, Portland, OR 97227

(503) 287-8800

Ya know when somebody describes something to you and they say,”My meal was the size of a football!”, or “The meat was huge, like a baby’s head!”….well, maybe not a baby’s head, but you get what I mean.  Usually when this is being said, it’s really a slight exaggeration.  However at Gravy the size of the omelettes are REALLY the size of a SMALL FOOTBALL!!  It was crazy.  I think the MEAT-O-METER’s eyes popped out of his head when he saw his food.  (true exaggeration)

What we ordered:  Omelette w/ choice of 3 ingredients; bacon, sausage and smoked salmon.  Pork chop and eggs.  Both dishes were served w/ the choice of fruit, potatoes or hash browns.

How we ordered it:  The choice of ingredients for the omelette was really diverse.  There was a list of cheeses, list of veggies and list of meats to add.  This made it super easy to order Paleo.  We ordered the omelette w/ smoked salmon, double-wide bacon and sausage.  Pork and eggs were as is.  Both dishes ordered w/ bowl of fruit.

What we got:

Omelette w/ your choice of 3 ingredients.

Omelette w/ your choice of 3 ingredients.

Ummm, let’s see that again….

Inside of the build your own omelette.

Inside of the "Build your own omelette."

 

Pork Chop and Eggs

Pork Chops and Eggs

Cost:  Omelette – $9.25, Pork chops and eggs – $11.75

Quality:  Everything was very tasty.   The smoked salmon was a bit dry b/c it was cooked a little too long, but apparently you can also get the salmon on the side if you like, so that it doesn’t cook any longer while in the omelette.  I’d like to see how big that portion really is!  Sausage and bacon was excellent as well. 

Quantity:  The salmon in the omelette was literally a whole filet. We had never seen anything so ginormous!  The pic pretty much speaks for itself.  The Pork Chops were perfect!  I was definitely stuffed and very satisfied. 

MEAT-O-METER says!

 

IMG_1202

First meal in a long time where the MEAT-O-METER barely finished!  It was a struggle but he did it and he was proud.  It takes a lot to make him stuffed to the gills.  Warning, do NOT go here on the weekend.  If you go, be prepared to wait.  During the weekdays, you are golden!  They’re open until 3pm, so get in for a late breakfast and notice you will not have to eat for many many many hours.

Yay for Gravy!




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